I was brought up in a very strict Roman Catholic home. I was baptized, made my First Communion and Confirmation and attended church every Sunday until I got my first job.
I started missing out on church after I got my first job, much to the displeasure of my parents who believed that in order to be good one had to attend church regularly.
I eventually stopped attending church and slowly I saw myself transforming into a ‘heathen’. I attended a few church crusades (Seventh Day Adventist and Evangelical) here and there but most times it was to criticize their belief. Despite the fact that I was not attending mass at the Roman Catholic Church, I was still a Catholic at heart and I resented anyone who criticized it. I viewed these new religions as people whose only interests were to criticize “my Church.”
I must confess when I attended these crusades I did hear the gospel and knew that I was not right with God. I was afraid to die. I can remember coming from parties drunk and while driving home I would pray to God asking him to help me to arrive home safely. This pattern continued for a few years.
In 1978, I went to London on vacation for six (6) weeks and when I returned home, to my surprise, I found most of my friends smoking marijuana. Initially I really disliked them for participating in such behaviour but soon after I found myself right in their midst smoking "pot" as well.
Later on we formed a group with an ex-acolyte who had become disenchanted with the Roman Catholic Church. He told us of some terrible things which were happening in the Catholic Church and this caused me to develop a hatred for all churches. We thought they were all corrupt and were misleading the people.
Bible reading was compulsory in our new group. We worshipped on Saturdays because we truly believed that Saturday was the Sabbath - although we continued to smoke marijuana. We also believed that Jesus Christ was the Messiah but this had more to do with our upbringing as Roman Catholics than anything else.
I stayed in this group from 1978 to 1981. Towards the end of 1981, problems developed in the group and most of the members left to join the Seventh Day Adventist Church but this time around I did not follow them.
A Christian friend, who was a member of the First Baptist Church in Castries, used to witness to me constantly but I thought she was becoming a nuisance and I eventually started avoiding her. One day she was so frustrated with me for rejecting the Gospel that she told me she would "just leave me for God." I did not mind, if that meant that she would not harass me anymore with the Gospel.
I went back to the world - drinking and living an immoral life. I was enjoying the sins of the flesh although I was always afraid of dying in that condition. This life style continued until one Friday evening in December 1982.
I was contemplating on going out to a particular party and thinking which girl I should choose to accompany me. Then suddenly this thought came to my mind (not a voice) "look at what you are thinking of; suppose you get involve in an accident and you die, what will happen to your soul?" For the first time in my life I started feeling guilty about my sins; the sins I used to enjoy and boast about. That evening I felt like nothing. I went to my room and started crying. I think I must have cried all night. Then I asked God to forgive me and asked Jesus to save me.
On Sunday, I knew I had to attend church, despite the fact that I had really turned against all churches. I was ashamed to go to church in the town of Vieux-Fort where people knew my views about church so I visited a small Evangelical Church in Augier, a community about seven (7) miles away from my home.
The First Baptist Church soon after started a Bible Study in a man’s living room in Vieux Fort. This Bible Study developed into weekly Sunday School and Sunday morning services. I joined the group which in time became the Berean Baptist Fellowship under the guidance of Malcolm Scholar who was an elder of the First Baptist church.
By the Providence of God I was led there and from the beginning I was introduced to the Doctrines of Grace. This is how my Christian journey started.